Oscar and Snake D. Plissken

It is again that time of the year when Hollywood dresses up as your typical glamorous starlet and kisses its ass. Yep, it’s Oscar time. To celebrate in my own way this cinematic “joyful happening” coming soon to a Kodak Theater not near you, I’ve compiled some of my favorite quotes from movies for you to enjoy. Perhaps you have some of your own to share??!!

From Escape From New York:

SNAKE PLISSKEN
"…I don't give a fuck about your war... or your president. Get a new president…"



HAUK
"…I'm ready to kick your ass out of the world, War Hero…"

From The Thing:

MACREADY
"…Anyone messes with me, the whole camp goes!…"

PALMER
"…I was wondering when "El Capitan" was going to get a chance to use his pop gun…"

CLARK
"…I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pissed off, whatever it is…"

From The Terminator:

REESE
"…Listen, and understand. That terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.…"

A “classic” (!) from The Dead Pool with Clint Eastwood:

CALLAHAN (aka Dirty Harry)
"…Opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one…"

From Aliens:

HUDSON
"…Maybe you haven't been keeping up on current events, but we just got our asses kicked, pal!…"

HUDSON
"…What do you mean, they cut the power? How could they cut the fucking power, man? They're fucking animals!…"

From Total Recall, Arnuld "arrggggghhhhh" Schwarzenegger to a mutant:

DOUGLAS QUAID
"…Relax…You’ll live longer…"
(in fact this could be a great t-shirt!)

From Bad Santa, Billy Bob Thornton talking:

WILLIE
"…Are you off’ your fucking meds?…"
(another great t-shirt idea!)

Finally from a DOP - not a dope, a director photo – that I used to work with, Bert Tougas:

BERT TOUGAS (answering the director)
"…Well, it was badly framed, out of focus and the dolly jumped. Other than that, I think it’s a keeper…"

Video trash & treasures from the 80’s – part I

In the early eighties after some soccer or street hockey, we would spend a good chunk of the rest of our Saturday afternoon browsing the horror or sci fi section in some good old “mom and pop” video store. In 1982, these stores were popping everywhere and before the arrival of mega video chain “à la” Blockbuster Video, those shops were wonderful. The smell of stale popcorn mix in with the dust filling the shelves, the friendliness of the owner whom would know our names by heart, the defective neon lights flashing on and off in the horror section and movie posters everywhere – some given to us and adoring our bedroom wall; all elements conjuring up beautiful memories of my youth. Moreover, in 1982 - 83 the horror genre was at its zenith in term of popularity and quality. The sub-genre slasher was at the end of a tremendous cycle started with Halloween and more and more great horror and sci fi films released. In complement, the new craze in high tech device was the VCR either of the Betamax or VHS type. Everybody wanted one. These humongous and noisy machines, some with the eject door on top, were a pre teenager best friend.

Some video stores, for instance in my old neighborhood: Le Club Vidéo International, were wall to wall packed with movies. In the horror section with our mouths salivating at the covers, we would dare ourselves to rent such “monstrosities” as Happy Birthday To Me, My Bloody Valentine, Shivers or The Funhouse. Besides, those video covers were little work of art. The more gory and titillating were they, the more tempting they became.

The excitement and the agitation of renting one of those videos was similar to climbing on a rollercoaster ride at La Ronde. We knew that it was a challenge. Firstly, would the owner let us rent those films, rated R? Would our moms let us watch such bloody, exploitative and perverse atrocities? After all and certainly, we would rave about the gory special effects but also nervously giggle at the view of the mandatory semi nude - for the actress ! – sex scene displeasing categorically our parents. Oh well…too bad for them!

Anyway, here are some pics taken with my digital camera of VHS covers from my personal collection. I don't own a scanner - I'm so old school, sorry! - therefore some pics might be a bit warped on the edge due to the poor quality of the lens. Again...oh well!

Ebay is still...great! (or stuff found on ebay)

Ebay changed a lot. Since 1999, start of my membership, it morphed from an online yard sale / your typical pawnshop into something resembling a big chain store. I used to find a bunch of obscure stuff of so-so quality, bootlegs CDs and completely illegal but great DVDs, fan made compilation of movie trailers etc. Nowadays, it is the biggest online auction site, safe, reliable but somehow…boring. Auctions by particulars are becoming scarce. More and more “stores” are popping everywhere on the website, offering the buy it now option instead of good old auctions. The thrill of bidding and waiting anxiously to see if some sucker out bided us or if the seller shilled his auction or after winning an item the “will-I-received-the-item –or-have-I-been-shafted-by-some-15-years-old-jackass” is now replaced by the “thrill” of clicking and paying right away. Still, sometimes there are hidden gems underneath the monstrous pile of items / trash found on Ebay.

Such items are the recently bought from an American seller, five back issues from the early 80’s of the French fanzine – magazine Mad Movies Ciné Fantastique. This mag, first published in the 70’s and still going strong, deals with “le cinéma fantastique” (horror, sci fi, exploitation, thriller etc.) and was back in my teen years– with Fangoria – the ultimate reference regarding this genre.


On a Friday night, a few weeks ago while browsing Ebay, I came across a seller auctioning a bunch of Mad Movies from the early to mid eighties in mint condition. After a nerve wrecking bidding war to the last minute with some dude, I finally won five of my original eight Mad Movies bids. F**k yeah! Finishing my beer, it’s now time to pay the seller – I’m ashamed to tell you the total price…let’s say … it’s salty. A couple of weeks go by and the dumb ass mailman – I have a bunch of stories about this a-hole – delivers my package. I open the box and take the Mad Movies in my hands. Weird and amazing, they are in pristine condition, almost fresh from the printer and never read or handled. Some nostalgic tears are running down my face…Ebay is again making me very happy pleasing my inner child.


ok...must go and bid on Monsters Attack! # 3...

Newspaper movie ads part 2

More movie ads from my 80's scrapbook. Enjoy!









more to come...

M.I.A DVDs

DVDs have been around since 1995. After countless releases, enough to fill entire warehouses from top to bottom, some films have still never seen the light of day, forgotten in the vault of distributors around the world. Some movies are stuck in legal limbo hell: lost copyrights, feuds between video distributing companies, soundtrack rights changing hands etc.; others are simply left aside, disregarded like trash. No wonder that some websites proudly sale DVD-R of some unreleased titles. If major shit-heads distributors spit on the prospect of releasing such lost gems then why not Jim Bob Doe through his website? Pressing DVD-R from VHS transfer in his basement, selling them to prospect buyers like myself ? At least we’re able to watch our favorite gory cult sci fi movie on DVD. Even though most of time the quality “laisse à desirer”.

Oh well, here’s a list of DVDs still missing in action, still officially unreleased.

CURTAINS (1983, Richard Ciupka, Vestron Video)
This Canadian semi-slasher holds a special place in my memories: the ice skating scene with the psycho-girl wearing an old hag mask carrying an axe…memorable. The rights of this creepy movie are probably buried in the video catalog acquired by a major distributor or laying under the arse of some sleaze ball Canadian producer. Probably will never get a decent release on DVD.

THE DEADLY INTRUDER (1985, John McCauley, Thorn Emi Video)
Obscure slasher, amateurish and not very memorable. However, I had the poster in my room back in the 80’s and nowadays, the movie is for me very nostalgic. Like Curtains , probably will never get release on DVD.

THE VIDEO DEAD (1987, Robert Scott, Embassy Home Entertainment)
By far, not a great zombie flick and probably not a great flick. I mean the acting is horrible but the story is engaging and the SFX are well made for such a low budget. In fact, this zombie-fest was very entertaining when I rented it a couple of years ago. Unfortunately like many Embassy Home titles presently own, I think, by MGM ( Humongous for example), Video Dead might never rise from the VHS cemetery.

THE KEEP (1983, Michael Mann, Paramout Pictures Home Video)
Ok, we’ve all seen it. You might not remember it or even not like it but I’m a fan of it and to this day don’t understand why The Keep isn’t yet released??? Either Paramount doesn’t give a flying f**k about it, completely disregards fans of this movie or Michael Mann doesn’t want to see it release for some obscure reasons – now that he is a big shot Hollywood director. This film would be very nice on a two discs special edition loaded with extras…Shame Paramount, shame.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot...

RITUALS (1977, Peter Carter) another great canadian flick (what is the @$#! problem with the releases of canadian horror films???) reminiscent of Deliverance is finally suppose to see the light of day very soon thanks to Code Red. But after pushing back - twice! - the release date maybe they'll give us this little classic in 2010... or 2011 or 2012?!

That’s it for now but lots more to come…gotta go eat something and watch The Keep on DVD-R….

Newspaper movie ads part 1

I don't believe it...I thought that I was the only one...so specand original...oh well...In 1984 and until 88, one of my hobbies was to keep in a cheap scrapbook clippings from french newspapers (La Presse, Le Journal De Montréal) of horror and sci fi movies playing in town. For me this was a kind of a wish list of films that I wanted to see. Some were for rated for adults only (18 ans et plus, equivalent of a R rating) meaning that I could only rent them.

Anyway, after a couple of searches on the "wonderful" world of web, I've discovered that some blogs we're completely dedicated to such hobbies... to my surprise. Held Over! ( see link at your right..no, the other right...!) is one of them. A very interesting and well made blog.

So for now, I'll give you an "aperçu" of my little collection.

Enjoy!

Do you remember Paperboy?

Back in 1983 and between some Atari games, me and my little posse would go downtown Montreal on St-Catherine street and tour some of our favorite arcades. Although a bit scared of the older bums hanging in those game rooms, we were only in grade 6 after all, the feeling of slipping your token into the brand new Star Wars arcade and being at the helm of a X-Wing Tie fighter was unbelievably gratifying and rewarding if you had the chops. For a few moments, I was a jedi… until my X-Wing had no more respond from R2 D2, usually followed by the dreaded “game over”…Or until a a-hole older teen put his quarters on top of the marquee leaving me with no choice of letting him play.

In a different arcade, we would try our hands at M.A.C.H. 3, a laserdisc game – the new thing. You would drop your two tokens – very expensive for us at the time - and the game started and ended as quick as your fist time in bed with a girl…but what a game! Later, it was back at one of the guy’s place for an evening session of Super Pitfall II on the Atari or Spy Hunter on the Colecovision.

Near my house and a few years later, a “depanneur” ProviSoir – was the meeting place of our gang each Saturday afternoon. Spending my weekly allowance was very common as all of it went into games like Commando – which top score was mine – or Paperboy with its unique handlebars for joystick. After sweating profusely and with a little cramp in my hand - and after being kicked out by the owner of the depanneur for disturbing the peace - , we would run to the nearest Italian café and play Juno First – which, once more, my chosen three letters were atop the list of high scorers. Good times, good times indeed.

Anyway…While surfing on the “wonderful” world of web, I’ve recently cam across M.A.M.E. or Multiple Arcade Machine Emulator and thought - not being very technologically savvy - that it was brand new and that I stumbled on a well-kept secret, etc. As my younger brother, a true gamer, reminded me after I’ve told him proudly of my finding: “Man, it’s been around since 97 or so”. Nevertheless, with MAME and a flight simulator joystick (not the best for arcade games mind you) I have rediscovered with great nostalgia lost gems from my arcade days. For more info on M.A.M.E. and arcade games:

mamedev.org

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MAME

http://www.klov.com/


10 FAVORITES ARCADES of the 80’S (rediscovered with M.A.M.E.)

Star Wars (Atari, 1983)
Commando (Nihon Bussan/AV Japan, 1985)
Paperboy (Atari Games, 1984)
Juno First (Konami, 1983)
Robotron 2084 (Williams Electronics, 1982)
Indiana Jones And the Temple of Doom (Atari , 1985)
Tempest (Atari, 1980)
Empire Strikes Back (Atari Games, 1985)
Shao-Lin’s Road (Konami, 1985)
M.A.C.H. 3 (Mylstar, 1983)